Die B!
by xxXBookHolicXxx
Summary: MAhahahahahahahahaha I'll torture the worst characters alive. If you like either, yuki or bella, don't bother reading!
1. WARNING!

Let the carnage begin. 

So me and my friend which doesn't want to be named so I'll call here Tajo decided that we wanted to destroy the worst two characters in the history of writing (Bella & Yuuki) so we abducted them and now we will destroy them in every way, physically and emotionally. LET'S BEGIN.

P.S. If you love, like or even think they are okey characters don't even bother reading.


	2. Bella's abduction

Hello people. Here's the new chapter. So GD is me gallina desplumada that's is in Spanish, look it on a dictionary if you don't know what it means because I'm too lazy to tell you.

Disclaimer: I do not own (thanks God) either bella or yukki(she appears in the next chapter.) Neither I own Darth Vader ( which is my English teacher) or Annoying apple which are funny videos of an orange talking in youtube. 

* * *

Bella is walking through a dark alley where druggies and prostitutes dwell, just because she is that stupid.

Bella: La, la, la, la, la, la.

GD: Hello, do you want candy.

Bella: No, my dad told me not to take candy from strangers.

GD: But I'm no stranger. I'm Darth Vader. (Thank God my English teacher for lending me her lightsaver and Darth Vader costume.)

Bella: OMG are you Darth Vader?!!!! O_O

GD: That's what I just said. :-/

Bella: Can I go to the dark side with you? You know how much I love to make Edmund save me.

GD: Wasn't it Edward?

Bella: -_- Whatever same shit. Where's my candy?!!!!

GD: Is in that van, were in most movies and fanfiction's are used to abduct people.

Bella: ^o^ YEY candy, yey. (Screams as she runs to the van.)

GD: (facepalm)

* * *

In the Cullen's household.

Edward: My Bella is stupid and is going to make herself get killed senses are tingling.

Emmett: Doesn't those sound like every five seconds.

Edward: True, hey let's watch annoying orange.

Emmett: Yey and since Bella is not here we can call your other lover.

Edward: YEY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

* * *

Who's Edwards lover ??? Will Bella be able to resist the candy ? which knowing her, she could trip over a piece of paper and choke on the candy.

Discover it in the next chapter REVIEW!!!!!! or else Darth Vader is gonna get you.


	3. Yuuki's abduction

So this is the new chapter yeah. So yes it took for ever well i don't have an excuse except the for alien thing and i don't think that will work so... I prefered the fist chapter because I just love to destroy bella but o well...

Disclaimer: I don't own Bella or Yuuki, I'm sorry for the poor soul that does, neither I own Hannah Montana or my little pony.

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Yuuki was looking on facebook, after figuring out how to turn on the computer, for new family members to harass. She already has a license for free sexual harassment to family members. Suddenly a pop up window appeared on the screen and it said "This is a virus but click here to open it". She clicked it just because it said so. The screen turned black and then a voice began talking.

Tajo: Well, hello Yuuki.

Yuuki: Are you my half sister?

Tajo: O~o No, why?

Yuuki: Then I don't want to talk to you.

Tajo: Why?

Yuuki: Because if I molest you I'll go to jail. I can only do that to family.

Tajo: Okey… :s I'm going to abduct you.

Yuuki: Why?

Tajo: Because I want to and my friend GD want to too.

Yuuki: Do I have another option.

Tajo: You know that's the funny thing about fanfiction, you don't have another option.

Yuuki: You don't either you are a hostage as much as I am because you are not writing this.

Tajo: Maybe… or maybe GD is not here with us any more Muhahahahahahaha.

Yuuki: Oh well, since I don't have any other option. Where are you going to pick me up?

Tajo: In your house so tell me where you live, so I can go and abduct you.

Yuuki: Okey * tells address * .

Tajo: Okey I'll pick you up at 5.

Yuuki: .

Tajo: Why not?

Yuuki: At that hour starts my favorite show.

Tajo: Which is?

Yuuki: Hannah Montana at 5:00 and My little Pony at 5:30 of course. So it has to be at 6:00.

Tajo: Fine * facepalm *.

* * *

Tell me what you think so review. Next chapter the torture begins Muhahahahaha( I really need to stop doing that.


	4. What comes first?

I'm back!!!!!!!!! Hi people this one goes for Abletrue my first reviewer.

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Chapter 3

GD: So you all know why you are here right?

Bella rises her hand.

Bella: Oh me, pick me, me, I know the answer to something for the first time!!!!

GD: Fine the idiot with her hand raised can answer.

Bella: YEY, we are here for the candy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yuuki: -_- Dude and I thought Miley Cyrus was stupid.

Bella: Oh, I know her. She auditioned for my paper on the movie but the director said she wanted a new idiot not a professional

GD: Okay? Enough, you two are here because I want to torture you physically and psychologically just for fun!

Bella: Yey! * Begins to clap *

Yuuki: Bella this isn't good so please stop clapping!!!!! .

Bella: . If I can say something, I prefer the psychological torture first.

GD: Why? :s

Bella: Because physically I do it every day. Hello, I told you already that I love when Eduardo saves me.

GD & Yuuki: It's Edward you moron!!!!!

GD: That was creepy. I still hate you. Anyways, Tajo!

Tajo enters the room.

GD: Tajo take Yuuki and begin the psychological torture. I'll take Bella.

Tajo: Okay.

Tajo leaves with Yuuki.

GD: Okay, you must be wondering why I have this TV here.

Bella: Actually I was wondering at what hour do they give Happy Tree Friends so I can get more ideas of how to hurt my self.

GD: * facepalm * Whatever, why do I even bother. I should already be a accustomed to your stupidity. Okay let the torture begin.

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Review because those make happy and that means updates sooner!!!!


	5. In Bella's case idiotlogical

Hello people here is the next chapter * confetti *

Disclaimer: I do not own either Bella, Yuuki, Barney, Calvin Clain or Victoria Secrets. I'm not even sure if I own myself.

Random power activate!!!

* * *

GD and Bella are in a room full of mirrors. There's a plasma TV connected to the net.

Bella: Are we going to see Barney?

GD: No.

Bella: We are watching the web page, .com? WTF O_o :S

GD: Let the show begin.

The cam shows a bed with two guys in it. Suddenly, Edward's voice fill the room.

Edward: Oh Jacob you are so good at this.

Jacob: Yeah, now I know why Bella left. -_-

Edward: You hurt my feelings. :( * begins to cry *

Jacob: Don't worry, you'll learn to count from 1 to 10, you just need practice.

Bella: Why?!! I tried to teach him and he gave up, but nooooooooooooooooooooooooo, Jacob is the perfect teacher!!!!

Tajo: * Poofs in * This is getting interesting. * Grabs a bowl of popcorn and starts enjoying the show. *

GD: Aren't you supposed to be with Yuuki?

Tajo: Yeah, I drugged her and put her to sleep on a dark, empty room. I left the Hobos watching her.

Gd: Okay, as long as someone is watching her. Now give me popcorn!! * Stares at the TV. *

Edward: One more thing, you putting yourself in danger is much more better than when Bella does it.

Jacob: O_o Okay????

Bella: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! * Keeps screaming. *

Tajo: This is the best movie ever!

GD: I know, right. * Bella keeps screaming. *

Edward: Jacob, a brought you a present. * Gives a very small gift box to Jacob. *

Jacob: * Opens present. * OMG O_O This is awesome!!! It has been my life long dream to own a Victoria Secrets bikini!!!!

Bella: NOOOOO, that's my super extra mini bikini that I use on Fridays.

Jacob: This is the best present ever! Now for the final part of the class.

Emmett enters the room with very small underwear on.

Emmett:Let's begin our modeling for Calvin Clain's and Victoria Secret's underwear and bikinis!!!!!!

Edward & Jacob: YEYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! * Everyone on the screen began to dance at the lyrics of the opening song of the Barney series. *

Tajo: * Keeps eating popcorn, watching intensely at the creen. *

Emmett: Bring it on boys. Show your good side. * Starts taking pictures. *

Bella: * Starts running wildly, while screaming. Then trips on a paper, hits her face with a wall, and falls unconscious. *

GD: I guess this is over.

Tajo: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, I wanted to keep seeing Jacob and Edward doing the gay dance. Oh well, now I have to go, later suckers. * Poofs out. *

GD: Damn, apparently I don't have to do the physical torture, Bella did it all by herself.

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Reviw or no next chapter!!!! ;)


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